Because of a Teddy Bear
by NotGivingUp
Summary: A trip to the store goes horribly wrong. When Logan gets shot on the way home, he loses his memory. When he wakes up to find three boys, he quickly decides he doesn't enjoy their company. Will they win their friend back? FULL SUMMARY INSIDE! JAGAN SLASH!
1. Chapter 1 The Shot Rang Out

**Okay guys! I know this story has been long awaited by my readers, but here it finally is!**

**Full Summary: It was just a trip to the store for a present. How could it have gone so horribly wrong? When Logan gets shot on the way home, he loses his memory. But this isn't one of those stories. Nope. When Logan wakes up to find three boys staring at him, he quickly decides he doesn't enjoy their company. What will his best friends, and boyfriend, do without him? What will they do to try and get him back? Will he even ever come back?**

**Let's get started.**

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><p><strong>Chapter 1: The Shot Rang Out<strong>

Logan did a small fist pump as he spun his spinny chair in a circle. It took a couple weeks, but what he ordered had finally arrived at the local Target. He stood up, smiling, and walked over to his closet and pulled out a pair of sneakers and a jacket. It was windy that day in Californa, and it was supposed to rain. Remembering the chance of rain, Logan switched out his jacket for a thick-ish hoodie.

After putting on the shoes and the hoodie, Logan walked out in the living room, a smile still on his face. He scanned the living room as he walked out, seeing if anyone he didn't want knowing where he was going was still in the apartment. Seeing the coast clear, only his boyfriend, James, sitting on the orange couch.

"Where are you going?" James asked, spoting Logan.

"I'm gonna go pick up Carlos' birthday present. You want to join me?" Logan asked walking over to the kitchen area and stopping, waiting for James' answer.

"Sure, but wasn't Carlos' birthday last month? And didn't you get him a 20 dollar gift certificate to Walmart?"

"Yes it was, and yes I did. But I had planned for another gift, that just arrived at Target today, and I wish to go pick it up. I might not give it to Carlos anymore, but he'll still like it. Now come on, I don't wanna get caught in the rain."

"Okay, okay. Let me put some shoes on real fast." James said, running down the hall.

A total of 2 minutes later, the two boys were in a cab on their way to Target.

Upon arrivel, Logan payed the driver, and they climbed out. James jumped slightly as something cold and wet hit his head. "It's raining." He said, without even looking up. He knew what rain felt like.

"And that's why I'm wearing the hoodie. Now come on, I wanna try to get home before the rain starts coming down too hard." Logan said, grabbing James' hand and dragging him inside.

They walked through the store, stopping multiple times to look at random items on random shelfs, but they eventually made it to where the online orders got delivered.

"Hi, I'm here to pick up an item that arrived today." Logan said to the women running the counter.

"Name?" She asked, getting ready to type on ehr keyboard.

"Logan Mitchell. M-I-T-C-H-E-L-L." Logan said.

The women typed on her keyboard, clicked a couple things, and then said, "I'll be right back with it." Before turning away without another word, walking through a door behind her.

"Well? What if I didn't want it right now?" Logan asked to nobody before sticking his tongue out and turning around to lean against the counter, crossing his arms. He watched out of the corner of his eye as James did the same, but Logan could feel eyes on him.

He looked up at James, who was staring at him with a goofy grin. "What?" Logan asked in a nervous chuckle.

"I just forget how dorky you are sometimes." James said, shrugging.

"Oh, I'm plently dorking all the time, it's just on rare accesions that I'm extra dorky." Logan said, smiling back at James.

James chuckled before leaning in a giving Logan a quick peck on the lips. "Well, I love all you dorky-ness, extra or not." He said.

"Aw, aren't you sweet." A voice said behind them, making them both jump. "Here's your thing." The lady said, holding out a small brown box.

"Thanks." Logan said, sending the women a nervous smile.

"You two are a cute couple, just so you know." The lady smiled at Logan before sending a wink at James.

"Thank you." James said, nodding at the girl, covering for a now panicked looking Logan.

"Have a great day." She said, nodding back.

"You too." James gently grabbed the brown box from the counter and gently pulling Logan in the other direction.

Once they were out of earshot, James started chuckling. "What? What's funny?" Logan asked, looking up at James, a light blush covering his cheeks.

James threw and arm around Logan and kissed his forehead. "You're just cute."

Logan just ducked his head for a second before laying it on James' shoulder. "You wanna get something to eat while were here? I saw a Pizza Hut when we came in."

James shrugged, making Logan's head rise and fall. "Sure, but what about the rain?"

"Eh, so we'll get a little wet, so what? I really want to get some pizza, and see if it is what I ordered, because all I can tell is it's a box." Logan said, taking the brown box from James and looking at it. He gave it a gentle shake and something inside shook. "It's a box with something in it."

James laughed. "Yes, it is. So, pizza?"

"Please."

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><p>Logan shoved the last of his crust, which was at least half, into his mouth, making his cheeks pop out, and sucsessfully making him look like a cute chipmunk. In James' opinion anyway.<p>

James chuckled for what seemed like the hundredth time that day, wiping his face with a napkin. Logan shot him a puzzeled look, but his mouth was too full to ask what he was laughing at, even though he probably knew.

James just smiled at him, thinking about how it was just one of the many things he loved about Logan. Logan could always make him laugh, whether he was trying to or not.

Logan swolled his mouthfull, took a drink of his coke, and then looked at James again. "What?"

"I love you." James just kept smiling at Logan, but on the inside he was freaking out. That's not what he meant to say!

"W-what?" Logan asked, thanking the heavens he wasn't taking a drink, otherwise he woulda done the most awesome spit take all over James.

"Oh, uh, um..." James said. He was still in shock _that_ he said it.

"Did you mean it?" Logan asked, tears filling his eyes.

James instantly took Logan's hand, which was lying near his coke, into both hands. Logan lowered his head and stared at them. "Of course I did!" James said. "I just...was as caught off gaurd as you were. My heart spoke before my brain could process what the words were. I love you Logan."

James watched the top of Logan's head, which was all he could see. "Logan?" He asked gently. When he saw a clear drop fall onto the table, he jumped up from his seat, never letting go of Logan's hands, to sit on his knees in front of him. "Logie?"

When Logan didn't look up, James gently removed one hand from Logan's to put it under Logan's chin. James gently coaxed Logan to look at him, heart stopping momentairly at the sight of the tears in Logan's eyes. "Why are you crying?" James asked, starting to panic. Wasn't an 'I love you' supposed to be a good thing?

"B-because," Logan said, leaning in closer to James. "I l-love you too."

James was 99.9% sure everything stopped right then. Time just froze as Logan looked at him, his warm brown eyes shown with true love and tears of joy, that crooked smile of his that always made James' heart skip a beat forming on his face.

Everything was kicked back into high gear and Logan leaned in to eliminate the gap that was between them.

The kiss was soft and sweet, but to James it was almost like sensory overload. Sparks were shooting through his whole body at high speed, and the cool feel of Logan's tears against his hot face just made his stomach do weird flips. It always seemed to be like this, but this time it just seemed so much more intense, more passionate.

Apparently Logan felt it too, becuase he pulled away almost gasping. "I guess this means I can give you your gift now."

James took a deep breath before raising an eyebrow. "My gift?"

Logan grabbed the box and handed it to James. "Sorry I didn't get a chance to wrap, or even to see if it's the right gift. I kinda just picked it up."

James chuckled before standing back up and walking back over to the other side of the table. He picked up his little plastic knife and stabbed the tape at the top of the box, slowly cutting it open.

Once it was open, he reached in and felt something...fluffy? Gently pulling out the fluffy object, James soon held in his hands a...

Teddy bear?

James looked up at Logan, who smiled hesitantly, then looked back at the teddy bear.

It was medium sized, with white fur, and milk chocolate beads for eyes. It had a black line of thread for a smile and black button for a nose. And on it's chest was a little red heart with a blue L in it.

"I thought this was for Carlos?" Was the first question out of James' mouth as he looked up at Logan.

"Well, I had to have some excuse." Logan said, shrugging.

"What's it for?" James asked, looking back down at the teddy bear, and more closely at the cursive L in the little red heart.

"You remember on our 1 month anniversary, you told me I would forever be your little Logie-Bear?"

James smiled. He had meant that. Logan had always been little Logie-Bear to him and his friends, but James had told Logan he was James', forever and beyond.

"Yeah, I do." James said, not taking his eyes of the little bear in his hands.

"Well, here's your proof. That is your little Logie bear."

James looked up at Logan, smiling. "I love it." He said.

"Well, that's good then. I'd be worried if you didn't." Logan chuckled, bringing a hand to the back of his neck.

James laughed and leaned across the table to give Logan a quick peck on the nose, making the boy scrunch up his face, like he always did when James kissed his nose.

"Come on, let's head out. I wanna get home and cuddle with my Logie-Bear." James said, putting the bear back in it's box before piling up their trash into one big pile on their tray.

"Hmm, which one?" Logan asked, standing up and picking up the tray.

"Ha ha, you of course, silly." James laughed, picking up the box and his to-go cup of coke.

Logan smiled and threw away their trash, laying the tray next to the trash can. James rested the box between his side and his elbow, holding the drink in his hand, then he wrapped his free arm around Logan's waist, pulling him closer.

They walked outside to a small rainstorm. It wasn't coming down too hard, but it wasn't a coming down easy at all. James pulled Logan closer to him as they started to walk out. "You know we don't have a way home now, right?" James asked. Taxies were easy to find by the Palm Woods, but out by the malls, they were impossible to hunt down.

"We could call Kendall and tell him to bring the BTR mobile?" Logan said, reaching into his pocket and pulling out his cell phone.

"Oh, right. Do that." James said, still not realising his grip around Logan's waist.

Logan smiled and started scrolling through his contacts, looking for AAKendall, who had the extra A's at the beginning of his name so he was near the top, right along with ACarlos and AAAAJames.

Logan put up the phone to his ear and it wasn't long before Kendall answered. _"Hey Loges." _James heard Kendall say through the phone.

"Hey Ken, I was wondering if you could come pick me and James up?"

_"I was wondering where you ran off too. Yeah, sure, where you guys at?"_

"We're standing outside Tar-"

James felt Logan suddenly jerk backward slightly. He looked down just in time to see Logan's eyes roll back and he went limp. Thanks to James' grip on his waist he didn't fall to the ground, but his phone did. _"Logan? Hello?"_ James heard Kendall say over the phone.

That's when James heard the gun shot echo from the distant.

James instantly laid the unconsious Logan on the ground. "Logan? Logan!" James cried.

James scanned Logan quickly, trying to see if there was an obvious sign as to why Logan suddenly passed out.

That's when he saw the small hole in the side of Logan's forehead, already a thick stream of blood coming from it. "Oh my god, Logan!" James screamed.

_"Logan? James? What's going on? What's wrong?" _James heard Kendall's voice coming from the abandon phone.

James quickly picked it up and put it to his ear, tears already falling down his face. "K-Kendall, oh my god, Logan's been shot."

About a foot away, a small white teddy bear had falled halfway out of it box, getting soaked by rain and spilt coke.

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><p><strong>This chapter went on for FOREVER! Like, jeez! This is probably going to be the longest chapter in this story, although I had fully expected it to be the shortest. I just kept getting ideas that screamed "Hey! We're full of fluffy goodness right now, but we're going to be super angsty later!" So, yeah, I threw them in there. <strong>

**Okay, I'm gonna send a quick shout out to Forget the Moon-Ignore the Sky, who became my new stalker recently, and just made me super happy with her reviews, and got me back into the writing mood, which I kinda fell out of for a little while. So, here's your shout out! ^_^**

**Okay, so now I'm going to go sleep, then write updates for things that need to be updated, and then go sequel-ize things that need their sequels! Yay!**

**Review, please!**

**-Saun**


	2. Chapter 2 Calls, Cops, and Caught

**Oh. My. Gosh! You guys are freakin AMAZING! Chapter 1 got a total of 11 reviews, 20 alerts, and 13 favorites! That is blowing my mind!**

**Okay, so because you guys are just so awesome, I'll give you guys another chapter sooner than I expected. I should be writing the next chapter to 14 Days Apart, but, well, I don't wanna anymore. I wanna write this chapter! Haha.**

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><p><strong>Chapter 2: Calls, Cops, and Caught.<strong>

_"What? What do you mean shot?" _Kendall asked.

"I-I gotta call 911." James said, ending the call with Kendall and dialing 911.

_"911, what's your emergancy?"_ A calm voice answered.

"P-please he-help. My b-best friend j-just got shot i-i-in the he-head. We're o-outside of T-Target." James cried out.

_"Sir, calm down. How are his vitals?"_

James froze for a second. His vitals? What did that mean? "W-what?" James asked.

_"Is he still breathing?" _The voice asked, still staying calm.

"Oh." Was all James said. He looked down at Logan, who had already paled extremely, taking on a grayish tint. James couldn't tell if he was breathing or not, which scared him. He gently laid his head down on Logan's chest, and heard the faint sound of small breaths, along with a slow heart rate.

"Y-yes. He's s-still breathing." James didn't like that fact. 'Still' meant it could stop. "But it's r-really small, and his h-heart is beating really s-slow, and there's blood everywhere."

_"Okay. The ambulance will be there shortly."_

James sighed slightly. There was a chance. A chance of getting his Logie-Bear back.

James turned around suddenly, remembering the gift Logan got him. He quickly crawled over and picked up the neglected teddy bear from the ground, before crawling back over to Logan.

James held Logie bear in one hand while he grabbed Logan's hand in the other. James took a deep breath, forcing himself to calm down, and started talking. "Logie, you're gonna get through this, okay? You have to. I told you, your going to be my Logie-Bear forever and beyond, and you can't get away from me this easily."

James heard the ambulance in the near-distant.

"Everyone thinks of you as the weak one of the group. The little one. Prove them all wrong, right now. Show them how strong you can be when you need to be. I can't be strong for you this time, Loges. The ambulance is gonna take you and fix you up, but you gotta stay strong so they'll have _someone_ to fix, and not_ something _to send down to the morge. I'm forbidding that from happening, now. And you, with all your dorky toughness, can't say no to me. I love you, Logan, so much."

The amublance pulled up, making the crowd that had gather around them move away to make room.

Wait? Crowd?

James looked around, seeing a small crowd had formed around him. He must have been in real shock not to have realized what was going on around him. Well, then again, he'd only been focusing on Logan, no one else matter.

The paramedics came running over to them. James was roughly pushed away from Logan as they started checking over him.

And then...

"Let that _faggot _die!" A voice screamed from the crowd.

James, along with the paramedics and the crowd, all looked at the women who had screamed.

It was the women that had given them the box. They one who had called James sweet. The one who had called them a cute couple.

James stared, wide eyed. How could it have been her? She seemed so nice to them.

James did a scan of her. She was no longer in her Target uniform, now wearing a blue tank top and skinny jeans with a pair of tennis shoes. Her dark brown hair was no longer in a ponytail, falling down around her shoulders. And she was hold a small white purse...

That had the handle of a gun sticking out of it.

"You shot him!" James cried.

A police men, who must've shown up with the paramedics, ran over to the girl. Another one walked over to where James was. James watched as the cop talked to the girl, pulling the gun from her purse. He didn't arrest her, but he did gently drag her past the ambulance, where the police car must've been parked.

"Hey, son." The man beside James said, gently shaking his shoulder.

"W-what?" James asked, looking at him.

"You're a witness, right? You're the one who called us in?" The man asked.

"Y-yes, sir. My names James Diamond, and that's-" James turned around to point at Logan, who was now gone. James looked around frantically, trying to find him. He saw the paramedics loading him into the amublance. "I-I gotta go with him." James said.

The man nodded. "I don't think there's room in the ambulance, but I can give you a ride in my car. We can talk about what happened on the way."

James should've realized that that was the police man's way of getting to question James, as a witness, but he didn't. He saw it as a way to stay as close to Logan as possible. "Okay."

James watched as a paramedic shut the doors to the back of the ambulance before running up to the front to start driving. James stood up with the help of the man and they walked to where two police cars were sitting. The girl was sitting in one, her arms crossed over her chest in a pout, but when she saw James walked by, she glared at him and raised her middle finger, mouthing slowly _'Go to hell'._

James shuddered at the sight, before turning back to the man, who was also watching the women. "Do you know her?" The man asked.

"Uh, no. Me and Logan came here earlier to pick up a gift he ordered online." James said, only them remembering the teddy bear that was still in his hand. "She was the one who was running the counter. She saw us kiss and told us we were a cute couple. Guess her definition of 'cute' is different from mine, and probably the rest of the world."

The man nodded and opened up the passenger door to the other police car. James climbed in and sat down, putting on his seat belt. The police man walked around the front of the car and climbed into the driver's seat. "You seem oddly calm, James." He said as he started up the car.

"Ha, the shock is setting in." James said. He knew he was acting weird, but he also knew he felt like all of this wasn't real. As soon as he had hung up with the 911 operator, the whole thing started feeling like a demonic nightmare.

The police man nodded and started following the ambulance, turning on the siren so he could keep up with the speeding ambulance. "Mind telling me what happened?" He asked.

James nodded and figured he'd might as well tell the whole story. "Logan came to me earlier today, telling me he had ordered something at Target and asked if I wanted to go with him. I agreeded and we took a taxi over. We came and got the gift from that not-then-crazy women. As we were heading out, we decided to stop at the Pizza Hut inside and get some food. We sat down at one of the tables near by and ate..." James trailed off, remembering what happened next.

"Then what happened?" The man asked, coaxing James to continue.

James didn't really want to share the personal part, but he figured again that he might as well. "We, uh, shared our first 'I love you's. Then we threw our trash away and went outside. It was raining really hard, and I told Logan we didn't have a way home. He said he'd call our other friend Kendall to come get us...oh my god Kendall. He's probably a wreck right now."

"So, you and Logan are a couple?" The police man asked. He had to get his facts straight, then he'd ask about friends/family.

"Um, yeah, for about 5 months now. Our 6th month anniversary is in 2 weeks from tomorrow." James said.

The police man nodded. "You have a phone to call your friend with? If not, you can use mine." The man said.

James shook his head, reaching into his pocket. "No, no, I'm good. Calling him would be a good idea." James said as he dialed Kendall's phone number.

_"James! Tell me what the hell is going on right now!" _Was the sweet answer James got.

"Logan got shot." Was James' simple answer.

_"Yes. You told me that earlier. Give me some more detail before I strangle you." _Kendall growled back.

"We came out of Target, Logan called you, and a gun shot rang out. Now Logan has a bullet in his head because of some stupid homophobic women." James said.

That's when the feeling of it all being a nightmare fell away and James came crashing back into reality.

Logan. Had. Been. Shot.

James listened to Kendall's gasp echo through the phone, before a loud _creech_ sounded, which James guessed was Kendall dropping the phone. He must've hit the same wall James had.

_"James, what hospital are you guys going to?" _James heard Carlos' voice now. By the calmness in his voice, they all, minus Kendall, must've thought, or hoped, Logan had only gotten shot in a minor injury.

James looked at the police man, only realizing now that he still didn't know his name. James tried forming a full sentence, to ask what hospital they were taking Logan, but the only word that came out was, "Hospital?"

The nameless man gently took the phone from James' hand. He must've sensed James slowly crashing. He stated who he was, and where they were going, before handing the phone back to James. The call had ended.

They drove for about 7 more minutes before pulling up to the emergancy enterance behind the ambulance. James quickly climbed out of the car, watching as the paramedics opened the doors and climbed out.

That's when the most terrifing thing that ever could happen to James, happened.

"Get him in there!" One of the paramdics called, trying to get Logan out of the ambulance as fast as possible. "Hurry, go! He's crashing! Go!"

James' heart dropped, but the grip he still had on the teddy bear turned white knuckled.

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><p><strong>Okay, well, this could've turned out a lot better. But, it's at least satisfying (pretty sure I didn't spell that right.)<strong>

**Here's a fun fact:. The guy who plays Carlos' dad, Erik Estrada? Yeah he played a cop in Drake and Josh! Haha. It was the episode "Driver's License". How cool is that? Lol, I thought it was pretty cool.**

**Okay, so even though this chapter kinda sucked, it got us going somewhere, right? So, you guys keep up your awesomeness, and review!**

**-Saun**


	3. Chapter 3 Thoughts

**Okay guys, 1 I'm sorry this took kinda long-ish, school suddenly became a crazy surge of work. 2 I'm **_**super **_**sorry I haven't been replying to your guys' awesome reviews, like super sorry. I'm usually really good at replying, but again the school work kinda jumped in and took that time away, so I promise you from this chapter on, I will reply to every review. Okay? Okay.**

**Now, who loved my awesome cliff hanger on the last chapter? ...Aw, nobody? Was it that cruel of a cliff hanger? Oh, well, let's fix that up with chapter!**

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><p><strong>Chapter Three: Thoughts.<strong>

James ran in after the paramedics, the police man following closely behind. He didn't say a thing as he saw the paramedics roll Logan through the room, yelling things in their medical codes. All he could focus on was Logan, and how he looked just so white/gray. The red tint on his cheeks that always seemed to be there was gone, as were those sparkly beautiful chocolate brown eyes, hidden under his closed eyelids, which were, at this moment, unlikely to open again.

The realization of Logan probably being dead hit him hard. "Logan!" He cried out, just in time before the paramedics took him behind some large double doors.

"Oh my god." James said, legs turning to jelly and threating to give out. The police man seemed to realize this and gently lead/pushed James into a chair near the doors.

"You okay, son?" He asked.

James just shook his head weakly. "He just- He was- oh my god." James said, dropping his head into his heads.

The police officer just sat down next to James and rubbed his shoulder in what was supposed to be a comforting way, but it caused the tears to start falling. James didn't want to be comfort by some cop in the middle of the emergancy room because his boyfriend got shot!

James wasn't sure how long he sat there, just re-thinking over the day. From when he woke up with Logan looking up at him, to the mess they made just trying to make brownies after lunch (to keep things simple, the brownies never made it to the oven), to when Logan asked him to come to the store with him.

He was thinking about Logan calling Kendall when the doors opened again. He was thinking about Logan falling to the ground when hurried footsteps enter the room. He was thining about the-

"James!" A voice called.

James looked up to see Carlos and Kendall running towards him. Carlos tackled him into a hug while Kendall waited patenintly for his turn. Once Carlos released James and moved to the side, Kendall stepped foward and got on his knees in front of James. "Are you okay?" He asked gently.

James laughed sarcastically. "Oh yeah, I'm fine. My boyfriend just got wheeled away by paramedics yelling random crap because they couldn't get his heart to start again." James said, only realizing what he said afterwards.

"W-what?" Carlos asked, tears instantly filling his eyes.

"Oh my god." Kendall said, tears also falling from his eyes.

"Uh, now that your friends are here, I think I'm going to head back to the office. Try to find out if that woman shot, Logan is it? If she shot Logan or not." The police man said, standing up. He was capable of tacking care of 1 upset teenage boy, but not 3. He was still knew at this.

"What's your name?" James called as he walked away.

"Did I not give it to you?" He asked back. James shook his head. "Oh, I'm Officer Jones, but you'll probably hear from one of my superiors if we find out anything. It was nice meeting you, though I wish it was a better situation." Officer Jones said, before reciving a nod from James and walking out through the doors.

"What did you mean by them not being able to start Logan's heart?" Carlos asked, his voice filled to the brim with fear and worry.

"When we got here, the paramedics rolled him in yelling he was crashing. I don't know much about medical terms, but I'm pretty sure that means he-" James choked back a sob, the other two knowing what he meant.

"Oh my god." Kendall repeated, as if those were the only words he remembered.

James only nodded in agreement, the three of them falling into silence. At one point the two boys on the floor moved to sit in the chairs, Carlos in the middle. Even though James was more upset than he ever remembered being, he was good at hiding it. Carlos was the oppisite, showing all of his feelings easily. He was laying against Kendall's chest, Kendall's arm wrapped around his shoulders, as he cried semi-silently, a sniffle or hiccup escaping his mouth every now and then.

James gently ran a finger along Carlos' knees, where his hand was resting. He was so lost in his train of thoughts, he wasn't even sure where his train of thoughts were. Somewhere along the tracks of yesterday and tomorrow.

"J-James?" Carlos voice broke through his mixed up up thoughts.

"Yeah 'Litos?"

"What's that?" Carlos asked sniffiling slightly, pointing to the teaddy bear in James' hand.

"Oh...it's the, ah, teddy bear Logan gave me today. Then I- uh, it went kinda downhill from there." James said, getting a look from Kendall. James knew he knew that he was going to say something else, but James had told Officer Jones that he told Logan that he loved him, but he didn't feel like he was ready to tell his best friends, which was kinda wierd, but a stranger wasn't going to judge who he loved. Especially if who he loved was also their best friend.

"Oh, okay." Carlos said, trailing off.

James closed his eyes, trying to pretend he was somewhere else. After a few minutes, James had almost conviced himself he was back in 2J, when someone grabbed his hand. He looked up, expecting to see Logan. His eyes were meant with Carlos staring up at him again. "He's gonna be alright, okay?" Carlos said.

James smiled, giving a small nod. "Okay." James knew there was a slight to none chance of Logan being alright in the world of the living, but he also knew that's what Carlos meant. Logan would be alright, no matter where he went.

James brought the teddy bear up to his chest, laying his head against Carlos' shoulder, and taking in the small scent of the teddy bear. Rain water and coke. He had to wash that thing eventually.

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><p><strong>Okay, so it's a little after midnight here, so I fail at updating when I told some of you guys I was gonna update, but I was close! This was just kinda a filler chapter, you know, get rid of Officer Jones, and give him a name, and bring Kendall and Carlos into this.<strong>

**So, I hope you guys like this alright-ish chapter.**

**Review, pretty please with kittens on top.**

**-Saun**


	4. Chapter 4 News

**Well, um, nothing to say for this A/N.**

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><p><strong>Chapter 4: News.<strong>

James stopped his pacing to look up at the clock above the doors. It was almost 10 after midnight. Logan had been, well wherever they took him, for almost 4 hours now. He was starting to worry, but he was glad nobody had came out to tell him Logan was dead yet.

"Oh, crap." Kendall said.

James turned and looked at him, Carlos was asleep laying against Kendall. "What?" James asked.

"My mom has called 15 times. I totally forgot about calling her." Kendall said running a hand through his hair and looking down at the sleeping Carlos on his chest. "She's probably having a heart attack right now, thank goodness Katie went to go stay the week with a friend in Minnesota." Kendall said.

James walked over to where he was sitting. "Here, switch me." James said, gently putting a hand against Carlos' shoulder and head to hold him up. Kendall slowly escaped from under Carlos and James took his place before Carlos woke up.

"Now, excuse me while I call my mom and let her yell at me for 10 minutes. You get me a-sap if you get any news." Kendall said, pointing at James.

"Uh, duh?" James said, a small smile forming on his face. Everyone had gotten used to the feeling of saddness, so it was a little easier to be happy for a moment.

Kendall nodded and walked out the doors.

James sat there for about 30 seconds before Carlos started squirming. Soon he sat up and blinked a couple times, looking at James. "Whoa, what happened to Kendall?"

"Mama Knight called. Several times." James said.

Carlos made a small "Oh."

James nodded. "Yeah. So, he went outside to call her. She's probably screaming bloody murder at him right now for scarring her."

Carlos chuckled a few times before laying his head on James' shoulder. "Has there been any news?" He asked.

James almost answered, but a doctor walked through the double doors, wearing scrubs covered with blood. James looked around the rooms, silently hoping there was someone else who he could be coming in for. Seeing noboy, which was probably a good thing, James held a hand up, telling Carlos to stay seated, before walking over to the doctor.

"Your here for Logan Mitchell?" He asked, but it kinda sounded like a statement.

"Yes sir." James said, nodding, a knot twisting up tight in his stomach.

"Well, I'm Dr. Kyle Elliott.

"Nice to meet you. How is Logan?"

The doctor looked at the ground, took a deep breath, then looked back up at James and-

* * *

><p>"Hey, Mom?" Kendall asked once he heard his mom pick up.<p>

_"Oh my goodness Kendall! Where are you? And where are the other boys?"_ Kendall turned and looked at hospital doors behind him, not really having the energy to tell his mom where he was at. And, truthfully, he'd rather have her yelling at him for a few minutes and let her be angry longer, before telling her that one of her boys were in the hospital because he got shot in the head. Especially because the last piece of news he got was that Logan was crashing.

"_Curfew is 11 o'clock for you boys and you now it! How dare you be out at such a late hour! And it such a city like L.A.! And how come you never answered me when I called? 15 times Kendall! 15 times! You know very well that you should have your phone with you at all times! Unless your at like movie at something, but I always know when your at the movies because you tell me._

_"But you didn't tell me anything! You just up and left the house without telling me where you were going and when you would be back. And I understand that your all grown up and don't need to tell me every where you go and every time, but if you're gonna be out this late I'd really prefer to know where you are!" _She ended with a small huff.

Kendall sighed. "Mom-"

_"Just, just tell me where you are right now!" _She yelled.

"Mom, I'm...I'm at the hospital." He heard a small gasp, and knew he was about to be overloaded with questions. "It-it's Logan. He- he-" The tears were welling up in his eyes again.

_"He what, Kendall?" _His mom asked calmly, but Kendall could tell she was probably getting her shoes on right now.

"He got shot." Kendall cried, knees shaking dangerously. He collapsed against the building wall and slid down to a sitting position. "Some-some homophobic women shot him in the head. Oh my god, Mom, we've been sitting here for 4 hours without any news. He was crashing when he arrived." Kendall said.

He heard a deep sigh on the other end. _"I...I'll be right there. Call me right away if you hear anything before I get there. Be careful."_

"Same to you Mom. I've seen you drive when your worried." Kendall chuckled half heartedly, wiping his eyes.

_"Love you, sweetie. Tell the same to James' and Carlos' and-"_

Kendall nodded, knowing what his mom was about to say. "I know Mom. Love you too."

With that, Kendall told her the hospital and where to come in at, and they said there goodbyes. Kendall went back inside.

* * *

><p>The doctor looked at the ground, took a deep breath, then looked back up at James and smiling. "Jeez, you have a lucky friend, son. He was probably the toughest case I had in a long time, both on his part and on mine. The bullet went in, but only slightly, causeing some internal bleeding, but nothing too serious. Didn't hit anything too vital, we're gonna run a couple test here in a while."<p>

"So- so he's okay?" James asked.

The doctor nodded and shrugged. "More or less, the risk of swelling and all the other brain damage... stuff are still in a high risk of happening. We'll be keeping a close watch on that. But, as of right now, he's pretty stable. The situation itself is gonna leave him listed as in critical condition for a couple days, but I'm gonna say you have a pretty lucky friend on your hands."

"Yes, yes, thank you. I- I have to go tell my friends." James said, practically bouncing in his shoes. He was alright! Logan was alright!

"And I have to go change. After we run some more test and get his room set up, I, or one of my nurses, will come down to tell you where to go to see him. Don't panic if it takes a while, sometimes the test take a little while. If you don't feel like waiting so long, you could-"

"No, no, don't worry about that. We'll wait." James said.

"Okay, well, we'll call you back in a few hours." The doctor said, before giving a small nod and walking back through the double doors.

James all but jumped back over to where Carlos and Kendall, who must have returned while he was talking to the Dr. Elliott. Kendall and Carlos shared a look, before looking back at James with hopeful eyes.

"He's alright. He said there's still a chance some stuff could happen, but he said Logan was pretty lucky. They're gonna run some more test to make sure everything's fine, and he said it's gonna take a couple hours, but once they're done they're gonna call us back to see him."

Carlos and Kendall both jumped up to hug James, all three suddenly in tears of joy. Sure, everything was perfect, but it was alright. At that moment, everything was alright.

* * *

><p>Even though Kendall had told her to be careful, Mrs. Knight had been a speed demon on the near-empty streets of L.A., arriving at the hospital in record time.<p>

She walked through the doors to see three crying boys wrapped in each other's arms, looking like they weren't going to let go anytime soon. Her stomach dropped at the sight, immediantly thinking the worse had happened.

She walked over slowly, but as she got closer, she saw small smiles on the boys' faces, little laughs escaping one of them every now and then. Everything seemed to lighten up as she approached.

She gently tapped Kendall on the shoulder, making the boy jump away from the other two and turn around to hug her. "He's alright." Kendall whispered. "They said he was alright."

Mrs. Knight hugged Kendall back and looked up at James and Carlos, who both still had one arm around each other's waist. Carlos was gently wiping away the tears with the back of his hand, while James savored the feeling of happy tears falling down his face. Mrs. Knight sent them a smile holding out an arm, offering them to join the hug.

Carlos jumped foward and joined in, but James just held up a hand and shook his head. "I'm gonna go to the bathroom." James said, sending a thumbs up to Mrs. Knight before walking to the other end of the waiting room and into the 1 stall men's bathroom.

James gently locked the door before sliding down against it, tears falling rapidly now. It was such a feeling of relief, James probably could've passed out. Instead, he sat on the bathroom floor, gently playing with the fur of the teddy bear, tears falling down, completely soaking the neck of his t-shirt.

Once the tears slowed down, he stood up and walked over to the sink. Even though it wasn't the most practical way, he got some hand soap, turned the water on, and began gently cleaning the teddy bear. A smile formed on his face as he washed it, gently humming "Nothing Even Matters" under his breath.

* * *

><p><strong>La! If you think about it, I updated twice in one day. Yay! I considered saving this until tomorrow, but you guys wanted to know what was going on with Logan, so I give you what was going on with Logan. *claps hands*<strong>

**Okay, well, time for me to do homework and get ready for bed! I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter!**

**Don't forget to review! My ninja kitties will be watching you!**

**-Saun**


	5. Chapter 5 Scared Stressed and Solace

**I'm sorry this took so long. I just...I don't really have an excuse. I don't think I've responded to any reviews either. I'm so so sorry, I've just been really bad at this so far. I'm working on it though. Thanks to any of you who are still sticking with me through my stupidty!**

**Okay, so 10 days ago was my 6th month anniversary on Fanfiction! How awesome is that? I think it's pretty awesome. XD**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 5: Scared, Stressed, and Solace<strong>

James was staring a white bed. A person once laid in that bed, but now all that remained were the sheets, neatly tucked in. Not a sound echoed through the room as James stared at this bed. He was trying to figure out why he was staring at this bed, or has to why he was even in this room.

The room itself was scary looking to James. The walls looked like they were once white, but now had taken a gray and worn look. The floor was white also, but tiled and speckled with black and browns spots. There was also a window, but it's blinds were down and it's dark blue curtains were drawn shut.

Suddenly there was a knocking behind him, which made James jump. He turned slightly, looking up to see who made the noise. "Carlos." He breathed out, the sight of the boy making him smile, but also his blood run cold.

Carlos looked was pale, really pale, which was really scary. His eyes were blood-shot and they lacked any type of shine or sparkle usually found in Carlos' eyes. Then there was this... _look_ in his eyes. A look that held pain, sorrow, disbelieve, and anger.

Three words left his mouth. "You did this."

James instantly felt tears prick at his eyes. Carlos sounded so, so broken, which made James' stomach drop. His buddy shouldn't sound so sad. "I-I what?" James asked.

"This is _all your fault_!" Carlos yelled in anger, which was rare. It made James cringe and take a step backwards.

"I don't know what you're talking about." James said, tears falling down his face. He couldn't stand Carlos' tone of voice, or the look in his eyes.

Carlos just shook his head, tears of his own forming. "I can't believe you." He said, turning to look at the ground.

"You- you gotta tell me what I did, Buddy." James cried, taking a step foward, but he didn't seem to move. The room seemed to grow around him, making Carlos seem impossibly far away. "I'll fix it, whatever it is. But you just gotta tell me what it is first."

"You can't!" Carlos screamed. "You can't fix anything James! He's gone and it's all your fault!" Carlos turned to look back at him, and James jumped back. Carlos; eyes had gone from brown to pure black, black as death itself.

"W-what?" James asked, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion and slight fear. "Carlitos, what are you talking about?"

"It's your fault Logan's dead!" Carlos yelled, suddenly appearing right in front of James, his death black eyes staring hard at James. "It's all your fault!" His voice had gone from sounding broken to sounding hateful, something James never expected to hear in any of his friends voices, let alone Carlos'.

James felt his knees buckling out from under him. He hit the ground.

"It's all your fault!" Carlos screamed again. The words filled James with sorrow and so many other feelings, but the voice Carlos was using to say them in filled him with dispair. He hated James, it was so clear.

He hated James.

Because it was James' fault Logan was dead.

Logan was _dead._

James covered his ears, trying to block out the sound of Carlos' voice, but it didn't seem to work, he just kept hearing his voice repeat, over and over again.

"It's all your fault! It's your fault Logan is dead! It's all your fault James!"

_"James!"_

He felt a hand on his shoulder and jerked away, afraid. Afraid of everything. But he pulled away to rough, he found himself falling.

For about 2 seconds before he hit the ground again.

"James! James, are you alright?" He heard Kendall's voice above him, then a hand on his shoulder again. This time he didn't push away, but he kept his eyes screwed shut.

"James, open your eyes. You're fine." That was Carlos. His voice had changed though. It was no longer hateful and accusing, but worried and confused. James relaxed, but still kept his eyes shut.

"James, honey, it was just a dream." _Mama Knight. _James thought. He turned his head away from where he heard Carlos' voice come from and towards Mrs. Knight's.

"A-a dream?" He asked, and then wanted to cringe at the sound of his voice. It was thick from sleep and crying. He could feel tears on his face still, and sweat dripping down from his hair.

Mrs. Knight nodded and ran a hand through James' hair. "Yes honey, just a dream. Now come on, let's get you off the floor."

James looked around slightly, still avioding the direction of Carlos. Yep, he was on the floor. On the floor of the waiting room in the hospital. James swallowed thickly before rolling over and getting back to his feet.

He looked down instantly once he was back in a chair. His body was still trembling slightly from fear, but he couldn't shake the image of Carlos' death black eyes staring at him, and the sound of his voice when he told him Logan was...

"Any news on Logan?" James asked, voice still thick and slow.

"Um, yeah." Kendall said. "A nurse came out while you were asleep. She said they were almost done with the stuff, and that it only be a little while longer."

James looked up at that, but carefully avioded looking at Carlos. "When was that?"

Kendall shrugged. "Half an hour, 45 minutes ago?" James nodded and looked back at the ground. Kendall shot his mom and pleading look, which she quickly caught.

"Hey, I'm gonna go see if they have a snack machine near here." Mrs. Knight said, standing up. "Carlos, would you like to join me?"

"Yeah!" Carlos said excitedly. Truly, he didn't want to leave James right now, but he could also tell Kendall wanted to have a private word with him. Plus, James was refusing to look at him, so he figured he wasn't needed at the moment. They could always sort things out at a less...stressing time.

Once Mrs. Knight and Carlos had gone, Kendall delivered a hard poke to James' shoulder. "Okay dude, spill. What was that dream about?"

James sighed. He didn't want to talk about it. He wanted to forget it ever happened. But, knowing Kendall, he was going to have to tell. "Logan died." James said.

Kendall took a deep breath, but nodded. He had fully expected that, and truthfully, he didn't know of anything comforting to say. There was no "It's going to be okay" or "He's all right" because they didn't know if was going to be okay and Logan was definately _not _all right.

So, Kendall asked the next big question. "How was Carlos involved?"

James looked up at him. "How do you know Carlos was involved?"

Kendall smiled at him. "I can just tell. So, what up?"

James sighed, again, and looked at the floor, again. "He was...accusing me for Logan's death. Telling me it was all my fault, over and over again." James voice had cracked by the end of the sentence, and tears were welling up in his eyes again.

Kendall put a hand on James' shoulder and pulled gently, making James look up at him. Kendall just looked into his eyes for a second. So many negative emotions lied in James' eyes, along side the tears. Kendall just wanted to pull him into a hug.

And that's what he did.

Normally, Kendall wasn't a big fan of such bromantical PDA, even if they were alone like they were now. But it had been such a stress filled night, and they were all strung so tight. Personally, and never shall he admit it, but Kendall really needed the hug too.

James was shocked as Kendall held onto him tight. Yes, Kendall was there unoffical leader, but he was better at comforting with words than with hugs and stuff. But James could understand. There wasn't any more room for words, only for actions. After a few seconds, James returned the hug, buring his head in Kendall's shoulder.

Kendall rubbed James' back sofly, pulling him tighter at the same time. All the emotions that had been piling up and growing in size were finally getting the best of Kendall, and tears were building up in his own eyes. "It's okay." Kendall chocked out, his voice cracking. "Just let it out." Those words were meant for James, but Kendall knew they were for him too.

They both pulled each other closer as the tears began falling faster and the whimpers started escaping. After steeling up the best they could through out the night, minor break downs escaping from time to time, they both finally just let the walls around them crumple, holding onto one another as they did.

Kendall was trying to recompose himself as fast as possible. He wasn't used to...this. He had made the motto that tears never fixed anything, and he stuck to it. But the more he tried to tell himself to suck it up, the faster the tears fell. Finally, he just buried his eyes into James' shoulder and...cried.

Through out there little bromance moment, James found them switching places. In the beggining, it was James who was crying and Kendall who was comforting and crying. Now, it was Kendall who was crying and James who was just comforting, he had ran out of tears for the moment. Soon, Kendall was just kind of curled up against James, sniffling softly as tears quietly fell.

The moment lasted for about 10 minutes, before Kendall broke it, letting out a quite, "Sorry."

James shook his head. "No need to apologize. We both needed it."

Kendall nodded. "I guess so."

James took a deep shaky breath, trying to relieve some of the headache that had formed behind his eyes. "Wonder what's taking Mama Knight and 'Litos so long." He pondered to himself.

"Carlos is probably trying to get ever quater and dollar out of her. He eats when he's upset."

James snorted. "Carlos eats no matter what his mood his. Heck, most of his moods are caused by food."

Kendall let out a chuckle, finally pulling away from James. James could tell he was building his walls back up again, he was too. Now he was only hoping that they didn't never crumpled like they had minutes before ever again.

A silence setteled between the two. It was both comforting, and awkward, the two boys lost in there own thoughts. It stayed like that until Carlos came back carrying an arm-full of snacks and Mrs. Knight followed behind with various types of drinks.

As James took a drink of pink lemonade, Carlos looked at him. "You feeling better Jamie?" He asked.

James swallowed the sweet liquid and looked at Carlos. His _brown_ eyes were full of concern, but they were shinning just like Carlos' eyes always had.

James smiled and threw an arm over Carlos' shoulder. "Yeah buddy, I am. Now if only that nurse would get out here and take us to Logie...hey, where's my bear?" James asked, looking around frantically.

"Oh, I have it." Mrs. Knight said, grabbing her purse from under the seat and pulling out the stuffed animal. "I didn't want to lose it while you were alseep." She said as she handed it to James.

James nodded and held the teddy bear close to him. "Thanks Mama Knight." He said. He turned and looked at Kendall. "Thanks, everyone."

Kendall gently punched James in the shoulder, then Carlos yelled, "Group hug!" He instantly launched himself at James, knocking him over into Kendall. They found themselves in an awkward position on the chairs. "Orrrrr," Carlos said. "Group pile on, apparently."

James and Kendall started laughing. Since they were told Logan was okay, everything had been a little more stress free, but it had been a long night and they still weren't out of the woods just yet. So James cherished the moment with his friends, forgetting his worries for the moment.

But he could never forget the fuzzy little bear that laid squished inbetween all of them.

* * *

><p><strong>That ending could've been better.<strong>

**Has anyone ever felt like somebody else should be updating their stories? While I was writing that little Kames moment, my computer died, and I was stuck feeling like I just had stopped reading, and all I had to do was go back and find the story again. Hmmm.**

**Anyway, how'd you guys like that chapter? Was it good, or was it a little too everywhere? Sorry if it was, I just wanted to throw a lot into what turned into a filler chapter. How was the nightmare at the beginning? Yes, it was a nightmare, just in case anybody is still confused. Logan is not actually dead, and Carlos does not have eyes that are black as death. And how about that Kames moment? I feel like it could've been better, but hey, everything can be improved, right? It was my first Kames anything, so woo-hoo for first!**

**Please review! I love to hear your thoughts and I AM GOING TO REPLY TO THEM! I cross my heart. I'm so so sorry I haven't been! I love them all SO much and I feel like a complete jerk for not doing so. I'm working on it!**

**-Saun**


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